Current:Home > StocksThis mother-in-law’s outrageous request went viral. Why 'grandmas' are rejecting that title. -PureWealth Academy
This mother-in-law’s outrageous request went viral. Why 'grandmas' are rejecting that title.
View
Date:2025-04-14 04:29:54
Are terms like "grandma" and "grandpa" a thing of the past? Some baby boomers apparently hope so.
Earlier this month, a woman went viral on TikTok for sharing a video about how her mother-in-law doesn't want to be called "grandma." Her suggestions instead? Mama paired with her last name − so Mama Smith, for example. This was quickly vetoed as her son and daughter-in-law pointed out this would likely end up shortened to mama, which did not sit well with the child's mom. The mother-in-law's next pick? "Queen mother."
"To be fair, I think she's watching 'Bridgerton,' so that may have played a role," the TikToker said in a video with 1.9 million views, adding her mother-in-law said it could be shortened to "queenie." She and her husband coaxed her mother-in-law out of "queenie" and got her to eventually agree to "G-ma."
The comments were flooded with users who lamented they've fielded similar requests from their parents and in-laws: "My father seriously wanted to be called 'your honor;' "My mom wanted mom-mom 'because I'm their mom's mom.' No. Hard no;" "My (mother-in-law) just wanted Mama. I have never laughed at someone so hard." And recent data also speaks to that trend.
In August, Preply surveyed 1,500 Americans across all 50 states and found, "The baby boomer generation is … opting for nicknames that resonate more with their vibrant spirit and sense of individuality."
The most-popular alternatives for grandma include nicknames like "Gigi," "Bibi" and "Momo;" while the most-popular grandpa alternatives include options like "G-pa" and "Grandude."
Boomers aren't the first generation to shake up traditional titles, but experts say their quest to reinvent what they're called as grandparents shows how many feel about aging and entering their golden years.
Why do people not want to be called 'grandma' or 'grandpa'?
Erik Anderson, a licensed marriage and family therapist, speculates there could be multiple reasons why baby boomers are opting to forgo being called "grandma" and "grandpa," including a denial of getting older.
It's also possible that, instead of denying their age, they more so don't want to seem old-fashioned or see themselves in the same light as their own grandparents.
Also, in a culture that emphasizes embracing the authentic self, new grandparents may just want to feel unique.
"People end up acting in relatively predictable ways, even when they're trying to strive for individuality and uniqueness," Anderson says.
Sometimes there could be a more sinister motivation. A grandmother wanting to be called "mama," for instance, may want to usurp control of a grandchild from their mother by going by a similar title.
"People should have the freedom to be addressed by whatever they would like, but again, it has to be something too that's not duplicating what already exists or infringes on the parents," psychotherapist Stephanie Sarkis says. "It could be a power and control issue. (Or) it could just be not being aware of how that could impact the parent."
Furious at your parents for aging?You're not alone.
What if a grandparent wants to be called something outrageous?
So what should parents do if a grandparent wants to be called something truly outrageous? Anderson and Sarkis agree that, while it's generous to let a grandparent select their title, ultimately, the child's parents get final approval.
"The family with the young children gets to make those decisions, or at least has a little more leeway or rights than grandma or grandpa," Anderson says, adding that parents setting boundaries also sets a healthy example for their children.
How will you look when you're 80?A new TikTok filter predicts Gen Z's future wrinkles, and insecurities, in a viral trend
Sarkis says it's important to be firm, yet compassionate, toward grandparents who insist on an inappropriate title, while still explaining your reasons for rejecting their request.
"You just say, 'Hey, that name, well, we don't want to confuse the baby, so how about we come up with another name?' " Sarkis says. "People have the right to come up with a name that they find appropriate for them, but the parent also has the right to say that that's not OK with them."
If a grandparent does come up with a nickname that both they and the child's parents like, then it can be a good way of allowing the grandparent to feel empowered as they step into their new role as grandma − or g-ma or whatever they want to call it.
"That freedom of being able to choose what you want to be called, there's a lot of power in that," Sarkis says. "For some people, they just don't identify with certain names for grandparents, and that's OK."
Melissa Gilbert:'Little House on the Prairie' star on why she ditched Botox, embraced aging
veryGood! (6778)
Related
- Could Bill Belichick, Robert Kraft reunite? Maybe in Pro Football Hall of Fame's 2026 class
- Ex-gang leader makes his bid in Las Vegas court for house arrest before trial in Tupac Shakur case
- Nick Saban says adapting to college football change is part of ongoing success at Alabama
- Basdeo Panday, Trinidad and Tobago’s first prime minister of Indian descent, dies
- Scoot flight from Singapore to Wuhan turns back after 'technical issue' detected
- Sophie Turner Calls 2023 the Year of the Girlies After Joe Jonas Breakup
- Michigan beats Alabama 27-20 in overtime on Blake Corum’s TD run to reach national title game
- North Korea's Kim Jong Un orders military to thoroughly annihilate U.S. if provoked, state media say
- Jamie Foxx gets stitches after a glass is thrown at him during dinner in Beverly Hills
- 'AGT: Fantasy League' premiere: Simon Cowell feels 'dumped' after Mel B steals skating duo
Ranking
- Biden administration makes final diplomatic push for stability across a turbulent Mideast
- After a grueling 2023, here are four predictions for media in 2024
- Brazil’s economy improves during President Lula’s first year back, but a political divide remains
- Taylor Swift duplicates Travis Kelce's jacket for New Year's Eve Chiefs vs. Bengals game
- Rams vs. 49ers highlights: LA wins rainy defensive struggle in key divisional game
- Niners celebrate clinching NFC's top seed while watching tiny TV in FedExField locker room
- Israel-Hamas war will go on for many more months, Netanyahu says
- California 10-year-old used father's stolen gun to fatally shoot boy, authorities say
Recommendation
Have Dry, Sensitive Skin? You Need To Add These Gentle Skincare Products to Your Routine
Bachelor Nation's Kaitlyn Bristowe Denies Cheating on Jason Tartick After Being Spotted With Zac Clark
More Americans think foreign policy should be a top US priority for 2024, an AP-NORC poll finds
A driver fleeing New York City police speeds onto a sidewalk and injures 7 pedestrians
Rolling Loud 2024: Lineup, how to stream the world's largest hip hop music festival
Powerful earthquakes off Japan's west coast prompt tsunami warnings
Low-Effort Products To Try if Your 2024 New Year’s Resolution Is to Work Out, but You Hate Exercise
Rays shortstop Wander Franco arrested amid allegations of relationship with minor, AP source says